


The Most Human Color

by camiinta



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: AND SOME KLANGST BECAUSE WHY NOT, BOY DO I LIKE WRITING ANGST, Bisexual Lance, Female pronouns for Pidge, Galra Keith, Gay Keith, Gen, IM NOT GOOD WITH FLUFF N STUFF, Langst, M/M, Mwahaha, Paladins switching lions, ShiroGONE, Trans (FtM) Lance, i'll try not to curse but uhhhhhh, wee woo wee woo everyone we got some shit going down
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-27
Updated: 2017-04-26
Packaged: 2018-10-11 14:34:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10467282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/camiinta/pseuds/camiinta
Summary: He played was a leg, just to make up the most powerful thing in the universe. But Lance still felt empty. He couldn't help it but feel like he wasn't contributing anything to the team. The seventh wheel."They don't need me. There can always be a better Blue Paladin. Besides, I know they don't want me around anyway." He whispered to himself, a single tear dripping onto the blankets.





	1. God, This Is All There Is

**Author's Note:**

> Chapters One and Two take place before the finale, and the rest of the story is what happens afterwards!

The team was celebrating.

 

Matt and a group of other former prisoners of the Galra had been safely retrieved. Pidge had broken down into tears and Shiro had done that happy, comforting smile when they reunited. Hunk was making puns and now giving out some of his homemade space goo dish to everyone. Even Keith, who rarely even smiles, was laughing and sometimes throwing some of his own jokes around. Allura and Coran were chatting among the aliens cheerfully, exchanging stories. Everyone was happy.

 

Except Lance. He just stood in the doorway of the room and watched everyone reunite and celebrate freedom from the Empire. Once again, he was nothing but a seventh wheel. He had been useless in the fight. And even more so in the rescue. So what made him deserve to be part of the party? Nothing. He never deserved it, so he stayed away from it. A bitter taste in his mouth and the familiar, sinking feeling in his gut, Lance turned away and walked off to his room.

 

And nobody notices.

 

• • • • •

 

"Hey, Lance!" There's a knock on his door. Lance didn't move from the position he was lying in on the bed.

 

"Lance, open up! It's me, Keith." Ugh.

 

"What do you want?" Lance mumbled, loud enough for Keith to hear but still somewhat quiet.

 

"I.... Just noticed you were missing from the party. So... I came to see if you were okay." Keith said. "Can I come in?"

 

"Fine." He muttered, finally getting up to open the door. It slid open slowly, letting out the familiar, low ksshh. Keith stood there in his regular clothes, his mullet as long and unfashionable as ever. He immediately pushed his way past Lance so he stood in the center of the room. Lance just quietly closed the door and returned to my place on the bed, lying with his back towards Keith and glaring at the wall.

 

"Lance, what's wrong." It wasn't said as a question. Keith was going straight-up to the point.

 

"What makes you think something's wrong?" Lance replied, keeping his voice low and calm. "I could just be tired."

 

"You don't seem tired. You just seem sad." Was that worry in his voice? Can't be.

 

"Please, Lance. Talk to me."

 

Lance sat up, sitting with his legs crossed, still facing the wall. He could feel Keith's eyes on his back.

 

 

"I... guess I just feel out of it right now." He lied, trying to maintain a smoothness in his voice. Keith wouldn't understand how he felt. He's always in the spotlight, always able to contribute to the team. Lance had nothing. Lance always had nothing, and always will have nothing. You can't sympathize with nothing when you have everything.

 

"Lance. Look at me." Keith's voice was getting more serious. Lance turned my head slightly to stare at Keith unenthusiastically out of the corner of his eye.

 

"Look, I—" Keith sighed. His voice lowered. "I won't push. But I just want you to know if you need anyone to talk to, I'm here for you."

 

Lance turned his head back to face the wall again. "Whatever, Dropout."

 

The silence was awkward but thankfully short.

 

"I'll take this as my cue to leave." There was some shuffling, and Lance heard door slide open again. Keith's footsteps faded into the corridor.


	2. And No One Ever Smiled

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance doesn't know what hurt more: Keith's remark or the throbbing pain in his ribcage.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: Suicide!! Violence!!

"Hunk, do you ever think about Earth?"

Hunk blinked. "Yeah. Of course I do. Why?"

"I dunno, it's just..." Lance sighed and stared at the floor. "Just got a homesick feeling all of a sudden, I guess."

His best friend made a small smile. "Same here buddy. I wonder what's happening down there. What day it is, if it's a holiday, if Donald Trump ended the world yet—"

"How your family is doing, and if they miss you..." Lance trailed off. Hunk gave him a sidelong glance, with a slightly concerned expression.

"You okay, buddy?"

Lance looked up at him, putting on a smile and letting out a small chuckle. "Yeah, fine. The feeling will pass. After all, we still have to save the universe, anyway, right?"

Hunk smiled again. "Right."

Lance stuck his legs up, leaning back and then rolling forward again to swing into a standing position. "I'm gonna go see what Coran is up to. Talk to you later, huh?"

"Anytime, buddy."

Lance never saw Coran. Or anybody, for that matter. Not for a long time.

• • • • •

Lance was shoved roughly to the ground. His helmet clattered off, skidding across the floor. Lance wheezed heavily when he felt a kick in his stomach.

"WHAT WERE YOU DOING?!" Keith was yelling. His leg was swinging back for another kick. Lance tried to brace himself, but still let out a sharp cry of pain when it landed.

Everyone was yelling at once. Everyone was yelling at him. His uselessness had really paid a price this time. The mission failed, Lance was just in the way, trying his best to help but couldn't do anything, resulting almost getting Pidge and Shiro killed. They ended up being fine, but it had still been an outrageous moment.

Once everyone calmed down, the only sound was Lance's wheezes from the floor of the castle room. He could feel the glares of everyone on him, even Hunk and Coran.

"You're useless, Lance." Shiro said, his voice as hard and cold as steel. "We need a better paladin then you."

The rage in Keith's eyes was beyond terrifying. "I think you should leave."

Lance doesn't know what hurt more: Keith's remark or the throbbing pain in his ribcage.

"Hunk... buddy." Lance wheezed, looking up at his friend for support. He was greeted by Hunk's disappointed face.

"Go home, Lance."

Lance let out a shaky breath. The pain from hearing this, his anxieties becoming real, made his eyes sting with tears. Slowly, he stood up.

Lance turned and ran. He ran and ran, ignoring the throbbing bruise feeling in his chest and stomach. He found himself in front of one of the airlocks, and without hesitation, he slammed his hand against the control, opening the doors. The airlock slid open, the vacuum of space yanking Lance's body into the vast emptiness.

Unable to breathe, and his first sob caught in his throat, the stars slowly began to fade out until everything was black.

• • • • •

Lance sat bolt upright in his bedroom, tears streaking down his cheeks and falling rapidly onto the sheets.

Immediately, he hunched over and began to sob. He cried into the silence, trying not to wake anyone in the dark of the castle.

Only one person heard. It was muffled, but surely there. Keith's eyes stared sadly at the ceiling in the next room, listening to Lance's sobs echo through the wall from the other side.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lance doesn't deserve this, honestly I'm making myself cry. KEITH WOULD NEVER DO THAT OK I FEEL ANGRY AT MYSELF FOR DEPICTING EVERYONE LIKE THIS BUT MY BOY HAS ANXIETIES
> 
> Tumblr: caminta-art 
> 
> Feel free to say what you think in the comments guys.
> 
> The artwork is rushed I know.


	3. They Just Followed Lead

"Dammit, Shiro, where are you..." Keith murmured, pacing the brightly lit control room of the castle.

Lance glanced at Keith. It's been the equivalent of three days since he disappeared. An unsettling mood was now over the castle, the hangars where the lions were all seemed gloomier and sending an unsettling presence.

Lance went over the plan in his head again. He had formulated it the night Shiro left. Step one: write a letter.

"Hey, does anyone have a notepad and something to write with?" Lance blurted suddenly.

"Lance, you know I never go anywhere without at least three," Pidge sighed, handing over one of her spare notebooks. "I happen to have been carrying these when we were all on the roof back at the Garrison, remember?"

Lance leaned over to Pidge across the seats to grab it. "Uh, yeah, uh....Thanks Pidge. I'll give it back when I'm done."

Pidge nodded, then continued to type rapidly on her high-tech laptop, the glow from the screen illuminating her glasses.

Lance stood up to leave, but then Allura began to speak.

"Paladins.... We haven't needed to use the lions or Voltron since Shiro's disappeared, but the universe still needs us. We'll need a new Black Paladin, and—"

"I'll be the Black Paladin." Keith cut her off, causing everyone to turn and look at him in surprise.

"Keith. Are you sure?" Allura's voice was hesitant, hovering.

"Yeah, buddy. I don't know if that's a good position for you," Hunk added.

Keith nodded. "It's what Shiro wanted. He told me, when we were stuck on that planet together after the wormhole incident, that he wanted me to lead Voltron if anything happened to him. And now, something has happened to him."

Even Coran looked uneasy at the thought. Paladins switching lions... That wasn't a good idea. Paladins were supposed to have a specific bond with their lions, each was different. Switching would clash with the bond between the paladin and the lion, making it unstable.

Lance still felt a heavy, sinking feeling in his gut. Shiro had told him that? It hurt to see the Shiro, the person Lance looked up to for years, rarely even noticed him unless he was being troublesome or out-of-place. Shiro did mostly everything with Keith, Allura, Pidge, and even Hunk, sometimes. But it was always the majority with Keith. Was that jealousy Lance felt? Guilt? Longing? Loathing, self-hatred at himself because he was never good enough for the team, much less Shiro.

Allura sighed. "Very well. Keith will pilot the Black Lion. Now we have to find a replacement for the Red Lion."

Keith cleared his throat. "Uhm... I want _Lance_ to pilot Red."

Lance choked, dropping the notepad.

"Keith, you're not serious." Pidge said. "You know Lance wouldn't be a fit pilot for Red. Red goes off of impulse and instinct. Lance is a strategist."

"Since when was I a strategist?" Lance muttered. "I always thought I was just the flirty, outgoing hothead who's too full of themselves."

"Don't say that, Lance—" Hunk said.

Lance forced a smile. "S'fine, bro. I was joking." The pang of despair grew stronger in his insides, but he kept it hidden. "I guess I'm the Red Paladin, now."

Allura looked just as uncomfortable as Lance felt. "Then I'll take the position of Blue Paladin."

Keith nodded again. If he nodded anymore his head would wobble off his neck like a broken bobble-head doll. "Then that's settled. Until we find Shiro again, we'll _have_ to do this."

Coran scooted in next to Allura. "I don't mean to speak of the irony, but we just picked up a distress signal from a ship nearby. The Empire is on the move."

Allura winced. "This... could be a team bonding exercise? And we can get used to our new lions, as well."

Everyone made a curt nod and jogged off to the lion hangars. Lance was left standing there, watching everyone head out.

"There's a 90% chance you won't make it to what you want in this universe," a voice piped up. Lance turned to find Slav watching him. Coran looked confused, but decided not to ask anything.

Lance grimaced. "Yeah, but the question is, what _do_ I want?"

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I messed up Lance's hand I'm gonna cry
> 
> This is like 200 more words than the other chapters so ding ding ding a bonus
> 
> Tumblr: caminta-art


	4. They Started Off Beneath The Knowledge Tree

Red was unfamiliar. The presence felt menacing and not as gentle as Blue. Lance grimaced, looking up at Red and awkwardly waving.

"Um... I'm supposed to be your paladin now?" He said. "Can I come in?"

Red's eyes seemed to glare down at Lance, making him feel small.

"Look, I don't like this switch around either, but we have to do it to help everyone in need. Until we get Shiro back, then Keith has to pilot Black and I have to pilot you. Okay? So... Please. Let me in. We have to go."

Red didn't budge. Lance's frustration swelled. "Okay. Fine. I get it. I'm not worthy. I'm never going to be worthy of you. I don't even know why I'm still here."

He let out a shuddering sigh. "I don't have any use among the team except being the loudmouth. The only place where I'm accepted is with my family at home, on Earth, because nobody listens to me anywhere else."

There was silence. Red still sat there, cold and unmoving.

 _Paladin_. Red's voice suddenly echoed in Lance's head. It was rough and metallic, definitely female, and seemed to resonate through Lance's form. _You do not belong with me, but with a different lion._

"I didn't realize I 'belonged' to even one. I thought Blue let me in because she's gentle and welcoming to anyone."

"Lance? What are you doing?! We need to go!" Keith's voice crackled in his helmet.

"S-sorry. Red's not letting me in." Lance murmured quietly in return.

"What?" Allura spoke. "Blue let me in without a problem."

"Same with Black for me." Keith agreed. "Try again."

"I've been trying! I don't know what to do!" Lance heard his voice raise slightly.

"For me, I kind of had to prove myself. I.... took down a bunch of soldiers while opening the airlock and being sucked into space. Then Red automatically flew out and ate me."

Lance blinked. "What."

"Poor choice of words but you get the gist. I hope."

"So I can just kill myself to prove myself worthy?" Lance asked. He immediately regretted saying it.

"Lance, why would you even say something like that?" Hunk whispered. Hunk was the only one who knew about Lance's depression and dysphoria at the Garrison. Hunk would understand.

"Yeah, that can be offensive to people who are suicidal," Pidge muttered. "It's basically making fun of them for their thoughts."

Lance said nothing. His mood was taking a nosedive off a cliff.

"You know what," Lance finally muttered. "I don't care. I never asked to be here. Red's not going to let me in. She's already told me that I don't belong here—"

"Wait, Red spoke to you?" Keith asked suddenly. "What did she say exactly?"

Lance was becoming more frustrated by the minute. "She said that I don't belong with her! Why does that matter so much!" He yelled.

As soon as the last word passed his lips, the Red Lion's eyes lit up, and her jaw unhinged slowly as she crouched down in front of Lance.

"What the cheese." he deadpanned.

"Red's never spoken to me before," Keith said quietly. "Go on and get in before she changes her mind. We gotta go."

Lance's shoulder's sagged. "Let's give this a shot."

He stepped into the unfamiliar red surroundings.

• • • • • •

Fire of all colors filled the sky. Droids marched in unison, and the cargo ships under attack lay abandoned.

"Are you okay?" Lance overheard Hunk asking to the crew members who took refuge.

"We are," one of them said. A mask covered their face, and they were dressed in armor and a leather-like material with delicate, silver-and-purple engravings running in through each crevice snd surface. It was hard to tell if they were male or female. "But our cargo isn't!"

What is in there?" Pidge yelled.

"A whole arsenal's worth of Skaian absorbers." Another one replied. This one was dressed similarly, except their mask only covered the lower half of their face. Green cat-pupil eyes with flecks of purple and gold darted back and forth between the ships and the paladins.

"What are... Skaian absorbers?" Lance found himself asking. The same alien looked at him.

"They're our form of weapons. We, the Skaians, developed it. They can absorb anything potentially dangerous and morph to fire that material until it runs out. It can also be absorbed into a weapon to make it stronger." The Skaian's eyes seemed to stare into Lance's soul, their gaze boring into his own. Lance felt uneasy, like he felt the Skaian was reading his thoughts, emotions.

Another explosion shook the planet, and Pidge let loose a string of curse words that would've made Shiro faint. If the man was here.

A silhouette stepped from the flames and the wreckage of the ship. They were tall and slim, a mane of seemingly glowing white hair flowing from their head and falling neatly over the glowing symbol of the Galra Empire emblazoned over his chest. His young, flawless purple skin seemed to glow, as well. Lance's first thought was ' _Walking shampoo commercial. Menacing, but a walking shampoo commercial_.'

He walked forward, moving with purpose and with his shoulders squared as if of high nobility. His grin widened when he caught sight of the paladins standing over the crouching Skaians, and he let out a laugh that seemed to reverberate through Lance's skeleton.

"Paladins of Voltron, at last we finally meet!" He called. "Now, prepare to be destroyed, one by one."

"Who are you?!" Lance faintly heard Allura yell next to him.

The man smiled more, his pointed ears twitching slightly as he mockingly bowed. "Princess Allura, allow me to introduce myself. I'm Prince Lotor, son of Zarkon and pride of the empire!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, 860 words! That's a record whoah.
> 
> The whole "Let me in Red please" scene seemed rushed oartly because it was rushed it was like 2am when I wrote it. Also sorry of OOC characters. Like Pidge.
> 
> And yeah. Skaians. That's totally not a Homestuck reference *cough cough* I couldn't think of anything else I'm sorry
> 
> Come scream at me on tumblr @caminta-art Where you can find EXCLUSIVE STUFF OF MINE


End file.
